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President Nana Akufo-Addo during his swearing-in ceremony at Independence Square in Accra, Ghana on 7 January 2017. File image

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... hence guaranteeing the arrest and taming of the very slippery Cedi, which has been on a Manchester United-like ascendancy since the canning of José Mourinho may not be a core value ...
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President Akufo-Addo’s recent assurance about his government doing everything possible to arrest the flight of the Ghanaian Cedi onto higher ground and unchartered territory has many wondering if his highly touted whiz man cum economic aficionado, Vice President Dr. Mahamudu Bawuwumia, is sleeping on the Cedi side of the job and unable to perform as far as the exchange rate is concerned.

Distress at the Jubilee House

President Akufo-Addo Vows to Arrest Rising Cedi

Waxing lyrically over the refrains of an earlier statement from the Jubilee House about how distraught The PoGH has been lately over the seemingly uncontainable diarrhea-like heaves of the national currency against her diabolical sisters: the British Pound Sterling and the United States Dollar at the inauguration of the Fujian Sentuo Ceramics Company at Kpone in the Greater Accra Region, the President assured the gathering that the arrest of the Cedi’s free-fall is imminent and at hand, stating that ‘Very soon we will be seeing the results of our policy’.

Bawumia and Mahama on Cedi redenomination

Mr. PoGH’s remark on the arrest and resuscitation of the Cedi, which as of yesterday was going for 1 USD = 5.49993 GHS and 1 GBP = 7.2660 GHS has led to many asking why now and not earlier? And why him making the announcement and not his vice, who in several apothericaric economic induced trances during the 2016 campaign cleanly and surgically diagnosed the Cedi’s ailments and effusively preached about the efficacies in his portfolio to help shock and tame the Cedi into complete submission. The exploits of the Cedi at the time was deemed to be beyond the ‘treatment’ of the then incompetent NDC government. Well, it’s been 2 years and some, and the expected delivery is ‘baabu’ for now on his end.

Reactions

The president’s call, although praiseworthy for businesses and consumers alike, has been met with several snide and humorous remarks on social media, with some wondering if he can boot-for-boot keep pace with the present unassailable leap of the Cedi given his years, excellent health and all, and how he can perform something that the miraculous powers of several of the famed pastors in the landsought unsuccessfully to do; - use their special relationship with the Lord to manipulate and stay the Cedi.

While many took to posting funny quips, a few posted below to salve their Cedi woes …

Cedi wahala

Cedi wahala

President Akufo-Addo Vows to Arrest Rising Cedi

 President Akufo-Addo Vows to Arrest Rising Cedi

President Akufo-Addo Vows to Arrest Rising Cedi

President Akufo-Addo Vows to Arrest Rising Cedi

Ghana Cedi

President Akufo-Addo Vows to Arrest Rising Cedi

President Akufo-Addo Vows to Arrest Rising Cedi

President Akufo-Addo Vows to Arrest Rising Cedi

President Akufo-Addo Vows to Arrest Rising Cedi

President Akufo-Addo Vows to Arrest Rising Cedi

President Akufo-Addo Vows to Arrest Rising Cedi

President Akufo-Addo Vows to Arrest Rising Cedi

cedi 05

 

President Akufo-Addo Vows to Arrest Rising Cedi

cedi 07

President Akufo-Addo Vows to Arrest Rising Cedi

…other well-known Ghanaians on Facebook such as Mr. Marricke K. Gane, an accountant, public speaker cum international development expert who is wildly rumored to be secretly considering an independent candidacy for the Presidency, subject to WAEC’s approval, the African Reform Movement’s Dr. Nii Amu Darko, a Ghanaian medical practitioner based in Australia, a Facebook darter, who claims to have the right scalpels for the job via his writings, and has publicly declared his candidature and is awaiting open registration season, and Evron Hughes, a Vice-Presidential Staffer to the very veritable Dr. Mahamudu Bawuwumia.

Marricke Gane

On his part, Mr. Gane is in wonderment as to whether there is a sudden conspiracy between the currencies of the world to low ball the Cedi to the bottom of the table of currencies or if it has something to do with debts that have failed to post bond, (bonded debts) and are presently being dominated and serviced in foreign currency.

Recommended: Exclusive Interview: Marricke Kofi Gane Talks Political Future and More - Part 1

 Dr. Amu Darko

Dr. Amu Darko on his part, referenced a piece titled ‘Let's Talk About The Cedi: Abaa Fo Obi Lɛ Nane – The Cedi and Bandaid Economics.’ that he scalpeled on July 24th, 2015. In the said piece, he likens the Cedi’s poor performance to the onset of full blown gangrene on a child’s leg, arising out of a mother’s self-prescribed mistreatment of an initial small wound.  According to him, the GoG is to date still treating the ‘’cedi wound’’ with bandaid – lies and propaganda.

RECOMMENDED: CEDI TALK: THE RISE OF THE CEDI AND BAND-AID ECONOMICS

Evron Hughes

Finally, Evron Hughes on his part referenced an article that he wrote, circa June or July last year (2018), - "Contending With Mahama's Economic Illiteracy and Incompetence" in response to comments he, John Dramani Mahama, made on the Emerging Markets currency rout in which the Ghana Cedi was also entangled. That piece, he says is as relevant today as it was then… and may perhaps offer an insight into the Cedi’s failure to respond to all the resurrection efforts that has been bestowed on it to date.

He added that "...the bottomline is this: the economic fundamentals are strong and the Ghana Cedi, while under pressure, is performing better than would otherwise have been possible were the fundamentals weak and the fiscal and monetary managers were to have been the incompetent bunch that was Mahama and his team."

 

Below is a downloadable PDF copy of it.

Contending With Mahama's Economic Illiteracy and Incompetence

Digressing to the president’s reassurance, age and seniority implies that he knows very well that ‘guarantee shoes’ are out of fashion, hence guaranteeing the arrest and taming of the very slippery Cedi, which has been on a Manchester United-like ascendancy since the canning of José Mourinho may not be a core value and can end up biting the NPP in the tookas come 2020.

Disclosure: This odd news report is just a parody, it is not aimed at fanning the flames, and is written with no malice intended.

 

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